Stop Rampant Misogyny and take an honest look in the mirror


February 12, 2015

Message to Najib Razak and Hadi Awang and Malay Muslims-Stop Rampant Misogyny and take an honest look in the mirror

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by Nadia Jalil@www.themalaymailonline.com

“Misogyny, in combination with a repressive and perverse attitude towards sexuality, has contributed to Malays having the highest rates of incest, rape, and unwed pregnancies.”–Nadia Jalil

Malaysian Muslims should struggle against anything in Malaysian culture which does not protect dignity and equality of human being.” — Tariq Ramadan, Kuala Lumpur, January 2015

Looking at developments in the US, I think there are few Muslims who would be unmoved by the large-scale protests against the #MuslimBan there. I wonder, though, how many of us Malay Muslims who have felt touched and inspired by the sight of non-Muslims in a “non-Muslim country” defending Muslims against oppression, felt a twinge of guilt at the fact that we have been complicit in, if not active participants of, oppression in our own country.

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Barack Obama’s Moderate Muslim Najib Razak and Islamic Extremist Hadi Awang  with India’s disciple of Sayyid Qutb. They are exploiting  ISLAM for their political survival.

Quite apart from the “special position” of Islam in Malaysia, which has been used to exert a kind of dominion over members of other faiths—from the major, such as the illegal expropriation of Orang Asli lands in Kelantan and elsewhere, to regular microaggressions like calls to boycott businesses owned by non-Muslims—it has now become very obvious that we have a very sick society.

Malay culture has become one of judgment over mercy. We have abandoned the precepts of hikmah in da’wah and adab when we indulge in amar ma’ruf nahi munkar (enjoining good and forbidding evil). Indeed, more often than not, we relish in public undertakings of nahi munkar and barely enjoin good at all. Social media may not be a perfect yardstick, but given that Malaysians are one of the most active users of social media in the world, it’s a pretty reliable measure of social attitudes. Observe, for instance, the public shaming that occurs when a Malay Muslim is judged to have strayed from accepted mores, particularly in cases where women do not follow conventions in terms of dress.

This behaviour is tied to a development that goes unnoticed in our communities: rampant misogyny. Universities host “cover your aurat” week in which women who do not don the hijab are shamed and harassed, sometimes physically. While a lot of the conversations surrounding the return of a deported serial rapist have centred on safety concerns, another, more worrying, trend is Malay men indulging in victim-shaming—informing women that if they wish to be safe, they should police their dressing and their behaviour. At the extreme end some have wished that the serial rapist would rape women who do not police themselves. We have movies that turn rapists into heroes, and cases where rape survivors have been forced to marry their rapists, a ‘solution’ that is condoned by the community.

This misogyny seems to be founded on a culture of patriarchy that has been given an Islamist sheen. In official and unofficial sermons, women are constantly told that we must be subservient to men, that the one and only way to heaven is by serving the men in our lives, whether they are our husbands, our fathers or our brothers. Exposure to this male chauvinism starts from a young age: in mixed-gender schools, boys are encouraged to be leaders, girls their followers. By contrast, we don’t teach our boys that men, too, have duties and responsibilities to their wives, mothers, and sisters.

Al-Tirmidhi Hadith 3252 Narrated by Aisha ; Abdullah ibn Abbas Allah’s Messenger (saws) said, “The best of you is he who is best to his family, and I am the best among you to my family.” 

This attitude stands in stark contrast to the fact that Islam is a religion for which the last Messenger’s (pbuh) first wife was a successful businesswoman and his employer, while another is widely acknowledged as one of the major narrators of hadith, for whom it is said, “the implications of her actions for women’s participation in scholarship, political life, and the public sphere clashed with later conservative conceptions of the role of women”.[1] Indeed, Islam revolutionised the role of women in 7th century Arabia: where once women were thought of as nothing more than chattel and female infanticide common, Islam proclaimed that they were equal to men in God’s eyes.

Misogyny, in combination with a repressive and perverse attitude towards sexuality, has contributed to Malays having the highest rates of incest, rape, and unwed pregnancies. There has been no recognition that this is the direct result of a patriarchal and misogynistic culture that objectifies women, in addition to a refusal to educate children on sexual health and reproductive rights. Rather, proposed solutions again tend to focus on victim shaming and increasingly punitive measures.

We have now become a people who emphasise religiosity over spirituality, good deeds and good conduct; obsessed over the trivial and ritualistic. We are constantly preoccupied by perceived incursions into our ‘rights’ by non-Muslims, and this siege mentality permeates our interactions with them: a clearly non-Halal pork burger restaurant gives one of its dishes a traditionally Malay name, and we are up in arms, claiming it an insult to our religion.

Where, then, are similarly vociferous outcries in matters of grave injustice? We police outward shows of religiosity—what we eat and what we wear, and demand that our rights supersede those of others, always. As citizens of a multicultural country we ignore the rights of others and public interest (maslahah) in order to chase “religious points”. We stand quietly by as an Islamist State government destroys Temiar lands and punishes members of the tribe who are protecting their homes and trying to stop the environmental devastation that occurs through excessive logging.

We don’t question massive embezzlement of public funds, even when we know that those funds are used to finance people going for Haj and Umrah—which seems to me a very perverse way of “spiritual money laundering”. We allow for the fact that many of our mosques are not sanctuaries but places where the most vulnerable amongst us are turned away.

Our preoccupation with religiosity is aided and abetted by an institutionalised religious infrastructure that infantilises Muslims by claiming that only it can “defend the honour of our faith” and “protect Muslims from becoming confused”. We are constantly told that only the official way is religiously acceptable, even if some rulings rely on a narrow and highly literal interpretation of Scripture. Any form of questioning, however slight, or criticism, however valid, is automatically labelled deviant, and an attack on Islam. In addition, we have a moral police that has been known to harass suspects to the point of causing death—how is this following the precepts of ‘adab?

The fact that Islam in Malaysia is now represented by moral policing, religious bigotry and misogyny has contributed to resentment among non-Muslims, giving rise to Islamophobia. Many non-Muslims lauded Trump for his anti-Muslim views because they have been presented and oppressed by this narrow, intolerant and sometimes, absolutely distorted version of Islam their whole lives.

There are other challenges, but the final one I would like to put forth is the rise in violent extremism. According to IMAN Research, as at August 2016, 236 Malaysians have been arrested by the authorities for joining ISIS, including a 14-year-old girl.[2] This is not surprising, given the fetishising of violent jihad above all other types of jihad, not only in some Madrasahs, but in ‘mainstream’ environments as well. In addition to that, official efforts by the establishment to counter violent extremism contrasts jarringly with domestic bigotry that continuously otherises those in the minority.

I highly suspect that part of this behaviour is due to the heavily politicised nature of Islam in this country, where UMNO and PAS regularly try to “out-Islam” the other, and all other political parties have to play along with this narrative. Thus has our faith been hijacked by rank politics and conflated with the bigoted ideology of Malay supremacy.

Of course, it can be argued that these are generalisations, and “not all Muslims” subscribe to these behaviours and have these views. I emphasise again that these are norms, in the sense that we have become desensitised to them and, apart from the statements made by more temperate Muslim organisations and our own private protestations, they continue on, generally unremarked and tolerated, if not accepted.

I am not at all questioning the position of Islam as the official religion of this country. Instead, what I am calling for is the end of this distorted misrepresentation of our faith. As those who are privileged to be in the majority, we have a duty to end oppression committed in the name of Islam.

I fully realise that I am preaching to the choir in an amplified echo chamber. However, ours is a more dissonant than harmonised, whereas those promoting a narrow and intolerant Islam far removed from the vibrancy and openness of the Muslim civilisations which continue to be our inspirations—of the Abbasids, Umayyads and Cordoba—are concentrated and organised. We have let this go on for far too long. If you care for an Islam in Malaysia that is representative of our faith’s beauty, ideals of justice, and rahmah, I submit that we have to act now.

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Islam is also not conformity and compulsion, but reason and compassion

Firstly, we need to arm ourselves with knowledge. Of Islam, of other faiths, of socio-political and economic developments. Knowledge is, as always, power. If you choose to be devout, as Tariq Ramadhan, the Professor of Contemporary Islamic Studies at Oxford University, has exhorted, “(i)f you want to be good Muslims, instead of preventing people from believing, you become better believers. Don’t be scared of people who are not Muslim. Be scared, be afraid, be worried about our own lack of consistency.”[3] 

Secondly, we need to strengthen our own communities, and get organised. We need to overcome petty disagreements surrounding minute differences in opinion and support those organisations that are already working to promote a tolerant Islam that fights oppression. We need to form alliances, and yes, we need to go beyond the echo chamber.

Finally, we need to act against oppressions conducted in our name. Loudly speak out and strongly act against bigotry, fight for the vulnerable and marginalised, insist that our mosques are opened as sanctuaries, promote Islam as it truly is.

We need to get to work.

*This is the personal opinion of the writer or publication and does not necessarily represent the views of Malay Mail Online.


[1] ‘15 Most Important Muslim Women in History’, https://ballandalus.wordpress.com/2014/03/08/15- important-muslim-women-in-history/ extracted on 10 February 2017.

[2] ‘The Allure of ISIS’, IMAN Research August 2016, https://issuu.com/theaffair/docs/newsletter- isis_1_aug2016 extracted on 10 February 2017.

[3] “Look in the mirror, Muslim don tells Malaysians critical of Western discrimination”, The Malay Mail Online, 1 February 2015, http://www.themalaymailonline.com/malaysia/article/look-in-the-mirror-muslim-don-tells- malaysians-critical-of-western-discrimi#sthash.lwflqwTZ.dpuf

12 thoughts on “Stop Rampant Misogyny and take an honest look in the mirror

  1. There are enough Malays who are prepared to be led by their noses like buffaloes by fake and politically motivated ulamaks (ular maks). They seemed to be unable to think for themselves. But if they are progressive and liberal, people like Harussani and Hadi will be out of business.–Din Merican

  2. A caged bird or a caged animal is never free. Sadly Muslims seem to be in such a situation like horses running with blinkers to a commanded track and direction. In years far back, when Christians leave Christianity, they were caught and killed, some of them put on stakes and burned to death. These are no more. But in Islamic world the punishment stands and a Muslim leaves Islam at his own peril because there is death penalty waiting for deserters.

    Religion came after man and it was man who created or invented religions. Religion should be subservient to man and not the other way round. But religion has taken over control of man’s mind to the extent of shaping his thinking and actions in accordance to its injunctions. The clergy-controlled churches, temples and mosques are the ever wealth earning rich institutions all over the world and most governments – however powerful they may be – leave them alone. If governments fear them, how can mortals like us not?

  3. I wonder what the reaction will be if the article is translated into Bahasa and read out in political ceramahs and at Friday mosque sermons?

    One reaction is certain, no applause, whether from the male or female section.

    BTW, what can you seriously expect from a religion, any religion, where the Supreme Being sends His own creations to burn in a Hell He created for ever and ever just for not believing in Him, or that He even exist, even though He does not even want to show His beautiful face?

    • @wayne, The heart of religion is the realization of one’s reaction when one looks into the mirror.
      In our MO1 world, it is the realization of monkey business one apes.
      Knowing there is one Nadia who would voice her conscience makes all the difference.
      It affirms my conviction that my God loves Melayu, even though all of our conscience are getting harder to find that love in our rational mind in the time of Valentine. Ditto on Nadia’s need to write in Malay. But, the fact that she couldn’t do so suggests how layu-layu the nation has become.

  4. Mis representation of religion, in fact any faith, is simply a very ordinary, very common and happens in all religion and any faith. Muslim have to stop believing that there is some sort of magic that excludes their religion. Even simple faith between husband and wife, between parents and children, yes even the most innocent such as mother and children, happens. It arises out of the fact the human creature, no matter who have weakness. You put that public power into the hands of weakness that can be the multitude of excuses, you will have abuse.

    The basic idea of secularity is that the public power of deep blind faith is too much in the hands of too ordinary and varid of weakness. Even though most of us do want what is basically good for everyone else, each and everyone of us are capable of the most horrific things given right circumstances and there are too many circumstances. Those instances which each of us capable of, adds up to too many given a population of even just simply millions.

    THERE IS NO FUTURE IN TRADITIONAL POLITICAL ISLAM – It is simple refuge for a difficult world but it is NOT answer. If there is a real future of political Islam, it lies at best in basic spirituality NOT in actual codes and specifics. The sooner Malay Muslim take the lead to insist on that, the sooner they go about actually doing what they want – unless they do not want to take responsibility for what they want and over-entitled.

    • @bigjoe99: For myself, there is political Islam. But, it is not clear what traditional political Islam would mean (of course I am speaking from the perspective of a non-Muslim, like yourself). It is unclear what ‘no future’ would mean as long as there is Allah (minimally when He exists in the hearts of Muslims). One thing I can be certain, if there is no ‘Allah’, there would be not much of humanity left.

    • Check out the response by Dr Asri the Mufti of Perlis to PAS accusation that he is becoming a liberal Muslim. Dr Asri practically read what and where PAS had used religion in pursuit of its political future. The Malays should reflect on the points addressed by Dr Asri.

  5. Quote:- “Ditto on Nadia’s need to write in Malay. But, the fact that she couldn’t do so suggests how layu-layu the nation has become”

    I think it is because her religion does not allow her.

  6. I just heard this news over the radio. The council of Muslim clerics in Haryana State in India have declared that they will not solemnise any marriage of Muslim couples unless they have a toilet constructed in the house where they will be living.

    That is progress. No progressive thoughts of any value can be expected from some of the retarded ulamas who knows nothing better than carry the balls of political leaders.

  7. The modern definition of ‘ Muslim ‘ is someone who is violent, intolerant, extremist, narrow minded, grossly insecure, self-centered and etc..

    Majority of the Malay/Muslim used to be highly respected for their for high degree of honesty, trustworthiness and fairness and therefore, entrusted with the leadership and administration of the country……….now, sadly, many are just ‘ pariah ‘.

  8. //The modern definition of ‘ Muslim ‘ is someone who is violent, intolerant, extremist, narrow minded, grossly insecure, self-centered and etc..
    Perhaps in a Holy-War, or colonial-modern world. But, definitely not in today’s post-modern world.

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